Dear Reader
A few weekends ago, on a chilly Saturday morning, I snuggled up with my almost two-year-old daughter and proudly watched her say – and act out, with cute, flailing arms – the word “run!” We were watching on TV over a hundred of the fastest women in the U.S. of A. take to the streets of Florida for the US Olympics trials. Among them were a handful of women who had recently become mothers – and even one who was actually seven months pregnant.
When an @nbcsports post on Instagram pointed out the fact that 20 new moms in total took part in the trials, a guy (I’m assuming he’s a guy, but hey, he could’ve been a bot) responded: “So you mean if you are a runner and mother nowadays it’s abig [sic] deal.” I resisted the urge to respond back to him on the post itself. But, yes, @manuel_maiyo, it is abig deal – a big deal, even – for many of us, to be a runner and mother. But more so, it’s a big deal to see a runner and a mother.
It’s a big deal to have examples of what can be where previously there weren’t that many, whether that’s due to greater exposure or an increase in the actual number. Or due to, you know, a change in policy. It is no small thing to see mothers still chasing after high-hope dreams and audacious goals, when for so long it used to be the thought that those ambitions would fly out the window after having a baby.
It’s a big deal for society at large, but particularly for mothers ourselves, too. We know how inherently strong we are, but sometimes we need a little reminding. And sometimes, that’s a lot of times.
Especially in the haze that is postpartum. It can be a time of such great uncertainty, of not knowing what’s to come, of wondering which parts of you may return, and which may not. Seeing moms out there — professional runners and amateur semi-elites alike — showing us what’s possible helps fill that space left open by an imagination that’s been taken up by all things baby.
For those who haven’t quite settled into a postpartum running routine and for those who thought they had, only to find, as with so many things in parenting, that had changed rather quickly.
For those in the lingering fog of lost achievements who’ve forgotten the feats they’d previously achieved (like running a marathon or *ahem* having said baby).
Or for those who are still dealing with the physical remnants of the whole life-giving act, and its very body-altering repercussions, way beyond the six-week check-up.
Having others who’re running up ahead lets us know, through their feats, that it’s all going to be okay. Both for the times when you just can’t see how it will be, and for when you’re just too overwhelmed or busy or anxious to remember.
It’s also valuable to see the runner and mother not doing those big, magnificent things either. Every birth and parenting experience is different – it’s a refrain we hear over and over. But being exposed to a range of these experiences also helps us know we’re really, truly, not alone in them. Seeing women go for big goals and not always reaching them also lets us know it’s okay; the beauty lies in the tale itself. All these runners and mothers, in all their various guises, they all remind us — whether it’s four months or five years — that the story continues. It always does. In wonderful little ways we may not be able to quite see, in our sleep-deprived, hormone-fueled state.
I think it’s really important to hear these different experiences. Even though I’m closing in on two years of motherhood, I find I’m still calling myself a new mom because I believe it’s a state of mind, and I’ll be new at this forever. But I see the act of sharing the wisdom that has been learnt so far as a relay race of sorts – passing what I know to be true on to someone else in the hopes that they may benefit from it.
So I’m going to start sharing more stories from other new moms over on a newsletter called New Mom Run Club. This newsletter will be saved from you having to read about how I almost started stalking Michael Cera in my desperate attempt to find new parent friends, or how I just can’t seem to make myself a pre-daycare runner, no matter how hard I try.
In the meantime, I remain ever grateful for the runners and mothers. To me, they will always be A BIG DEAL.
Thank you for reading!
Your neighbour,
Nadia